Misperceptions

Here's some common ones my co-workers seem to have about me, voiced again this week:

1. I am a vegetarian.
2. I am always happy/optimistic/cheerful.

The truth?

1. Well, almost. But given that I ate chicken today and yesterday, I'd say not. But I (almost) wish I was one.
2. Flattered, but the truth is I'm like a duck: calm on the exterior, but often paddling furiously underneath.